NY Jets to Start an Actual Goose at QB Next Week in Order to Lose More Effectively

BREAKING NEWS: The New York Jets announced today, after their loss at home to the Las Vegas Raiders, that they will be making a change at the quarterback position. Next week they will have a goose in that position. The name of the goose has yet to be announced but head coach Adam Gase seems to have high hopes for him, “Listen we barely lost this one today. I can’t have us winning a game next week against the Seahawks. They might be a good team but I need to make sure we’re worse.”

Gase went on to ensure that they goose in question has no playing experience as opposed to the 2 1/2 years quarterback Sam Darnold has, or the 13 years of veteran qb Joe Flacco. It seems however that the Jets organization views that as very positive. Joe Flacco gave this comment when asked how he felt about Gase’s choice, “Apparently we’re just here to lose games. I’ve dedicated my life to this sport. I’ve made sacrifices all my life to be the best I can be. But hey man, if they wanna play a goose instead of me then fine. You know I was super bowl MVP right?”

Jets fans will be happy to know that ‘Goose’ jerseys will be on sale early this coming week. The team is expecting them to be top sellers.